Saturday, September 10, 2011

Joy Pockets

Joining Monica at Bohemian Twilight for my little pockets of Joy this week.



* Seeing a happy Ceyda playing with her friends at school
*House and soul cleansing..started not completed but started...
*Deciding to treat myself to something special and then falling in love with all the handmade jewellery of Lylaaccessories on etsy.
*Realising the above designer lives only 1 hr away
* Celebrating 10 years of togetherness and 8 years of marriage over daytime lunch with lots of chatter, memories and starbucks 
*After a week of fretting cleaning and doing all sorts of daft things ( including sneaking several times to Ceydas Kindergarten so see if i could see her in the garden)  waking on Friday morning and just stopping....I took the advice of a friend..drank lovely coffee watched the 1st half eat prayl love washed the dog, and read read a good book with my feet up. 
*Receiving supportive emails and blog comments from friends and strangers about Ceyda starting Kindergarten.Thankyou. 
*Pretty flowers in the garden blooming 
* Laughing out loud when my husband told me i needed to start seeing my friends and getting out of the house.. i had just tried to strike up a conversation about the hideousness of the show Bridalplasty.


Have a lovely weekend !!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Kindergarten 100

This is my 100th blog post hence the 100 reference. 

I didnt even mention it before because i think i was thinking somehow it would never happen. Ceyda has started Kindergarten...i cant even blog about it as i feel such guilt. Her Turkish is so far behind  (especially after being away so much )that really she has to start a Turkish Kindergarten now... but its sooo hard yesterday wasnt so bad but today the tears as i dropped her off and then the tears when i picked her up. Tonight after her story she asked if she was going again tomorrow and i said yes the tears then followed..after kisses and chatting about school she told me " its boring at school" " i miss my friend Emma Aiden and Louis " and the hardest of all that she is worried that i am alone. Emma lives 1 hr from us Louis lives  in Scotland and Aiden is about to move back to the states. Oh i hope she makes a nice new friend she loves to hold hands and is used to being very close with other kids. Man this mummy stuff is hard i love having her a home with me we bake do art projects go on long walks see friends but we dont speak Turkish. 
She will go 4 full days a week to start Tues through Fri 9.30 till 4.30 ( although i can also pick her up after lunch) While she is a school her teachers say she is fine even ventured a few words in Turkish after 2 days...her teacher thinks a longer day is better as it will speed up her language learning and allow her to bond with the other kids who are all full time ( 5 days a week )9-6. Oh my heart is breaking and i do miss her, and what did is do the i last 2 days manic cleaning... coffee and rather depressing to admit short converastions with my dog..
Ceyda on her first day 

Friday, September 2, 2011

Joy Pockets

Its been an intense week... i am so not used to the heat...at times i have felt as though my little shipping is sinking..intensely lonely and a happy hermit... this weeks joy pockets create balance

Joining Monica with Joy Pockets


Bayram festivities with family after Ramadan ( food glorious food)
Ceyda with korays Aunt  Bayram Breakfast
*Chocolate Chocolate thats why they call it Sugar Bayram : ) : )
*Cool Mornings
* Family breakfasts  with a cool mountain breeze
Yum...





Monday, August 29, 2011

Scotland

We are home back in Izmir and although i am missing my family terribly (more so than i ever have) i am glad to have my feet on the ground and to be in my own bed ( oh how much i missed my bed) , even for a short while to spend some time as a family and friends.
5 weeks is the longest i have spent back at "home" in Scotland since taking a CELTA course in 2004.
The first few weeks when we arrived were the hardest as my father was still in hospital and my mother
(perhaps all of us) were still stuggling with the aftermath of this Summers events but we all got in a good rythmn with time and there have been so many precious family moments since.I have left feeling much closer to my father sisters and mother. 
Ceyda loved being in Scotland and i know my parents now ache for her they got used to her waking them in the morning, reading them (yes them) stories and generally being part of the delightful world of Ceyda. The Scottish air helped her grow 3 cm and she seemed to come back more grown up, more conversational and much more settled.. considering we have been on the move since June the 5th i am just happy she is happy.

Returning on the plane i wondered whether i had subconsciously never stayed in Scotland for too long after coming here. The fresh air, greeness and heavy summer rains certainly did wonders for my bruised soul.

So what did we get up to when we werent going for long walks, taking care of grandma and grandpa..watching reruns of the The apprentice or Dragons Den. (my evenings with my sis)
Having fun days out, in Izmir there are really only a handful of places that are for kids (there are more but in my opinion are more for parents..) so it was so nice to have so many different things to do and places to visit all the time. 

Seaworld Edinburgh

Camperdown Zoo with Daddy
Aftenoon drives with New friends

Family Meals

I cant tell you how much i love the picture above.
My mother and cousin are missing as thet are certainly outdoors having a sneaky..smoke..Koray is definitely dashing around after Ceyda. My great grandmother pictured ( with the pink wrist warmer) is watching with delightful worry as her great grandson is hung upsidedown by his daring daddy.My sisters concerned hand hangs on his shirt.My younger sister in the floral shirt is looking with bemusement at the waiter wondering why he standing like that, my aunt opposite her is in deep conversation with him and then there is my father sitting smiling....this is my family. I should add the topic of the conversation with the waiter was about how my great grandmother gives each staff member a bounty bar of chocolate every time she stops by the The Royal George Hotel for afternoon tea. ( she forgot to bring him a bar the day before and the words to match his hands were " Wheres my bounty Mrs. Proctor" you have to love her.

Mad Hatters Tea Party a the Walled Garden. 
The day before our flight home we all went to support my aunt and her friends at the annual Walled Garden Open Day.The event helps raise funds Mental Health Support in Scotland. My aunt is a hugely inspirational person a wonderful  and very talented artist whose life at times has been shadowed by bi polar disorder. She helped pioneer OneLeafOneLink a community project involving art therapy by reaching out to those who feel left out.Inspirational. This year her new project is PLUSleaveslinks.
Ceyda had her own hat to take part in the mad hatters hat competition and wow did we underestimate the competition.
em why am i the smallest mummy ?


and to finish.....




Thursday, August 11, 2011

Strength and Love

Strength and Love were the 2 miniature Angel Cards i picked for myself as i left my grandmothers late this afternoon. My grandmother is 86,delicate frail and uniquely spiritual she sees angels and is guided by a serenity that is quite unexplainable, she wasn't always this way, a 50'S housewife and mother it took the death of my grandfather for her to find her wings.
Today she told me my energy was calmer she was right of course. Since returning to my "home" i have felt as though i was stuck in a huge vacuum.. like a flightless bird waiting for the next gust of wind to set me soaring..i am not soaring yet but i can feel the breeze softly gently coming. Strength and Love. 

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Happy Birthday Ceyda

Yesterday was Ceydas 3rd Birthday. Happy Birthday Bee. The pics are borrowed from my aunt until i can get mine uploaded with the dodgy internet connection we have here. oops its already blinking....


Tinkerbells hideout

which present greatv gran ?


Saturday, July 16, 2011

Tolle And Nin

Most people treat the present moment as if it were an obstacle that they need to overcome. Since the present moment is Life itself, it is an insane way to live.Ekhart Tolle


Suddenly there is calm in the struggle i have had since returning from canada, we are staying at a friends garden Home in bodrum my flight is tomorrow, This place is so peaceful a teeny garden house retreat surrounded by mountains,last night i fell asleep asking for help maybe the universe maybe angels i dont really know , but i woke less tired... Less weighted And without the feeling of fear... That my father may be coming home for a short time...the Tolle quote i fell onto this morning it made me realise that this isnt something i can control or Fix it it what it is And that accepting everything for what it is...thats the answer.
Last night in tears my Mother relayed the same fear to Me that he was coming Home to die, i replied without thought but hes not mum hes coming home to live.

People living deeply have no fear of death.
Anais Nin