Being lonely is such a contradiction for me as i love to be alone and right now i crave for more time for myself...yet as hard as it to admit i feel lonely much of the time. Of course i am not alone i have lovely friends and a beautiful very fun daughter but i feel lonely.
Many of my friends have in the past few months started work again ( friends who used to pop by for playdates and long afternoon chats.)....or thier lives have suddenly become so busy or they are travelling or have returned home..as a result i am spending alot more time alone with Ceyda. I am also travelling into town up to 3 times a week and find this exhaustive. Ceyda said to me yeterday as we walked to the bus "no mama no bus", this broke my heart : (
I am tired and heavy my energy is low and i am trying to embrace this deep feeling of loneliness and see where it takes me.
Today is stage 1 of my declutter day, Ceyda will spend a few hours at the office with her daddy and i will pack up all of our old clothes to go to charity. Clear up the house and try to get my haircut..lets see how that goes. lol...i might need a timer : ) : )
The rest of this week i am either going to post pictures or write about Ceyda.I need to back off me for a while and give myself some time to get comfortable. : )
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