Yes i have a wee bee in bonnet and i have found a great way to zone out of it i am sure that you all know this song.. its been going on in my head for so long now. The past few weeks since Ceyda started Kindergarten family members, neighbours.. the list goese on this is what they say. "You should be pregnant by now" "Now you can get pregnant again" "Ceyda must have a brother" "When will you have another child" Why is there no baby yet" " are you pregnant ? " Do you now want another child ? I feel my anger rising a pefect example of this would be testing my stress level on my iphone normally it is 1% or 2% ( i am stressed but i manage it well i exercise, mediatate... sit on the balcony with coffees at 7am... lie on the grass to let the negativity seep out of me) On our regular Sunday breakfast i tested 36%.. hmmm i also coincidentally click on this song on Ace of Base ALL THAT SHE WANTS while trying to find songs for Ceyda now everytime a person mentions the word Bebek or Hamıile baby and pregnant in turkish it pops into my head and i suddenly feel this calm wash over me.. an inner smile as i visualise an Ali McBeal style ass whiping to questioner. All that i want is another baby.. thump thump.. ok so its not very Zen but it makes the moment sting alot less and it makes me smile and walk away without feeling that sickening anger towards someone who doesnt understand... The truth is i have wanted every baby we have lost before and after her birth, after 3 years of trying i am sick of the asking and people not listening it hurts me to be asked accusingly why i dont have another child or are we working hard enough.!!!!!
Oh, Isla - I'm so sorry you have to deal with such insensitivity. Some people just don't think, and ask questions that they have no business asking.
ReplyDeleteJust keep with those beautiful smiles. You don't have to answer to anyone.
xx
honestly, i find these questions intensely intrusive and effing rude actually. after 3 miscarriages i also came to appreciate how insensitive they were.
ReplyDeletenobody knows the details of what the mother is going through, such as miscarriages and the subsequent grief.
it took 6 yrs to get our little girl and not only does my body not cope well with pregnancy (especially now over 40), and i might struggle to conceive again, AND i don't want another baby.... it's nobody's business!
rant over :)